The Value Of A Drink

By
Real Estate Team Leader with Broker Team Lead (The Watz Team) Century 21 Affiliated

The Value of a Drink 



"Sometimes  when I reflect back on all the wine I drink
I feel  shame.
  Then  I look into the glass and think
about the workers in the vineyards and all of their hopes
and dreams
.   If I didn't drink this wine, they might be out
of work and their dreams would be shattered.
 
Then I say to  myself, "It is better that I drink this wine and let their
dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."
~ Jack  Handy


WARNING:  The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell  
happened to your bra and panties.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  

"I  feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they
wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're
going to feel all day. "
~Frank  Sinatra


WARNING:  The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are  tougher, smarter, faster  and better looking than most people.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."
~  Henny Youngman


WARNING:  The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case.  Coincidence?
  I  think not."
~ Stephen Wright  


WARNING:  The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk,
we fall asleep.  When we fall asleep, we commit no sin.
When we commit no sin, we go to  heaven. So, let's all
get drunk and go to heaven!"
~ Brian  O'Rourke


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  

"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
~ Benjamin  Franklin


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Without  question, the greatest invention in the
history of mankind is beer.  Oh, I grant you that the
wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel  does
not go nearly as well with pizza."
~ Dave Barry
 


WARNING:  The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

To some ! it's a six-pack, to me it's a Support Group. Salvation in a  can!

~ Dave  Howell


WARNING:  The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And saving the best for last, as explained by Cliff  Clavin, of  Cheers.
One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the Buffalo Theory to his buddy Norm.
Here's how it  went:


"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest  ones at the back that are killed first This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.  In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells.  Excessive intake of  alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells.  But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first.  In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.  That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."  


WARNING:  The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not

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Rainmaker
121,551
Vicki Watzlawick
Illinois Foreclosure Expert, The Watz Team
Broker Team Lead (The Watz Team) Century 21 Affiliated

George  You can never have enough friends!  And the drinkers..they get friendlier with every drink!

Julia  Send pictures  :)

June 05, 2007 02:28 PM
Ambassador
550,981
"The Lovely Wife" (Broker Bryantnulls Wife) The One And Only TLW.
President-Tutas Towne Realty, Inc.

I still hav not figed out wh it it nt ok tooo drnk an bog?

TLW...ROAR :)

June 05, 2007 04:24 PM
Rainmaker
121,551
Vicki Watzlawick
Illinois Foreclosure Expert, The Watz Team
Broker Team Lead (The Watz Team) Century 21 Affiliated
TLW  Eeets OK 
June 05, 2007 05:30 PM
Rainer
61,604
Jim Watzlawick
Watz Home Inspections
Watz Home Inspections
I think I know where the lost bra and panties are
June 05, 2007 09:03 PM
Rainmaker
121,551
Vicki Watzlawick
Illinois Foreclosure Expert, The Watz Team
Broker Team Lead (The Watz Team) Century 21 Affiliated
Jim you better baby!
June 05, 2007 09:17 PM
Anonymous
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Rainmaker
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Vicki Watzlawick

Illinois Foreclosure Expert, The Watz Team
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Additional Information

Illinois REO Realtor 9 year Certified Foreclosure and Shortsale expert for Illinois foreclosures. Co-author "Should I Short Sale My Home?" www.vickisdreamhomes.com