Funny Friday ~ Dogs and Cats

By
Real Estate Broker Owner with Sands Realty 210-414-0966 Texas License #0331413

Excerpts from a Dog's Diary
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

Excerpts from a Cat's Diary
Day 983 of my captivity...
~My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed
hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the
rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to
keep up my strength. ~The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of
escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet.
I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly
demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made
condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. %^$##!
~There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was
placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I
could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my
confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this
means, and how to use it to my advantage.
~Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my
tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this
again tomorrow - but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.
~The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and
seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The
bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the
guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now...

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Contact Shirley Parks with Sands Realty at 210-414-0966 or email shirley@shirleyparks.com.

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 We serve all of San Antonio, including the cities of Alamo Heights, Terrell Hills, Shavano Park, Hollywood Park, Hill Country Village, Bulverde, Garden Ridge, Schertz, Cibolo, Converse, Universal City.

We serve ALL neighborhoods, including Stone Oak, Encino Park, Cibolo Canyons, Rogers Ranch, Sonoma Ranch, Steubing Ranch, Canyon Springs, Alamo Ranch, Champions, Stonewall Ranch, The Dominion, and more.

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Comments 18 New Comment

Rainmaker
398,592
John Cannata
Texas Home Mortgage - Purchase or Refinance
214-728-0449 http://TexasLoanGuy.com

Thanks for the Saturday laughter (I missed it yesterday). That pretty much sounds like a cat to me.

August 22, 2009 01:01 PM
Rainmaker
211,275
Mary Strang
Real Estate

Cute, I do think this may be an accurate picture of dogs and cats and how they think.

August 24, 2009 07:59 AM
Rainmaker
238,110
Angelia Garcia
Pure Realtors

Marci likes to escape outside for a bit to see what she can kill.  But when her tummy starts talking its time to go inside.  She is 80% indoor cat.

August 24, 2009 08:36 PM
Rainmaker
263,766
Cheryl Powell
ABR,SFR,Broker-Concord & Charlotte NC Area Realtor
RE/MAX Executive Realty - The Powell Team

My dog gets excited when I take her on a ride in the car...100 feet down the driveway to get the mail. Not exactly gas efficient, but it makes her day!

August 24, 2009 09:22 PM
Ambassador
1,249,439
Robert (Vegas Bob) Swetz
Commercial & Residential Real Estate Agent
REALTY ONE GROUP - LAS VEGAS, NEVADA 702.443.7156

Shirley - This is very funny and thanks for the laugh!

  

August 25, 2009 11:00 PM
Rainmaker
522,757

Shirley Parks

Broker, 210-414-0966, San Antonio TX Homes
Need San Antonio Real Estate Help?
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We serve all areas of San Antonio, including Alamo Heights, Alamo Ranch, Boerne, Bulverde, Castle Hills, Champions, Cibolo, Converse, Deerfield, The Dominion, Encino Park, Fair Oaks Ranch, Garden Ridge, Helotes, Hill Country Village, Hollywood Park, Inwood, Leon Springs, Monte Vista, Northwest San Antonio, North Central San Antonio, Northwood, Olmos Park, Rogers Ranch, Schertz, Shavano Creek, Shavano Park, Sonterra, Stone Oak, Terrell Hills, Universal City, Ft. Sam Houston, and Randolph AFB. We proudly assist clients in every price range throughout the greater San Antonio metropolitan area as well as across the nation. Through our real estate web site, www.shirleyparks.com, you have the ability to search virtually every home for sale in the San Antonio area.