Decisions ....to be or not to Remain Being....

By
Real Estate Agent with Keller Williams 414-525-0563

  Did you ever notice that there are people in your life...that when THEY want something...they know your number..your cell, your home, your fax,....text...e-mail....front door....carrier pigeon...after all, it IS what is going on in their life...what they need, want, have to have...and NOW  !bitten heart

  Now ....YOU need....an answer, a recipe, a contact for....the name or number of.....an explanation about...and they quickly disappear into the blogosphere....the shadows, sea of abyss...never  only to be heard from again when THEY need, want, have to have.....(I am soooo not talking about the needs of buyers and sellers.)

   Be it resolved in this new year....lots of things are changing....and just like the "Peace on Earth" song....and "Let it begin with me..."

   When you find you are always the giver in the relationship and the "getting" is at will....or not at all...time to re-evaluate your relationships and how much you are willing to continue to give to those who value getting above giving...their needs, business and priorties of whatever nature above whatever you have requested.  I don't like to "meter out" caring..is there a better way...the decision for me, for now, is to change my response....to match the response I didn't get...but did need...did want...did care about...

   Being on the short end more of the time than the long one...not a good thing. Value yourself....and choose how you want to be treated.....the end.

 

 

Posted by

Sally K. & David L. Hanson, ABR, CDPE, CSS, e-Pro,ILHM, REDS

Sally K. & David L. Hanson  

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Rainmaker
1,227,715
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

I don't know quite how to read this, but as I said, keep us informed!

December 01, 2009 07:48 PM #1
Rainmaker
83,953
Tori Stamps
Stamps Realty - Franklin, TN
MA JD - Broker/Owner Franklin TN Homes for Sale

My husband had a friend like this before we got married.  My husband, wonderful soul that he is, is very giving and had never realized it until I kept pointing it out (I'm not very shy about pointing out a leech! *blush*)  Fortunately we ended up moving an hour away.  It was amazing, too, how much drama left our life when this "friendship" ended. 

I'm so glad you didn't term the people as "friends."  They certainly aren't - and never will be.  I prefer to focus on the "good" people of the world. 

**edited because I called my husband a "sole" (fish, foot? *eye roll*) **

December 01, 2009 07:59 PM #2
Anonymous
Anonymous
Anonymous

I so understand what you mean and have been wondering the same thing recently.  Somehow the saying "your failure to plan becomes my emergency"... keeps coming to mind.  Now is the time to spend with people who replenish you and not take away and leave nothing in return.

December 01, 2009 08:17 PM #3
Rainmaker
1,010,400
Sharon Tara
Sharon Tara Transformations - Portsmouth, NH
New Hampshire Home Stager

I am all for reevaluating relationships.  If it is all about me giving to you, I'm no longer interested!  Thanks, I needed that and I feel much better now!

December 01, 2009 08:24 PM #4
Rainmaker
1,360,165
Sally K. & David L. Hanson
Keller Williams 414-525-0563 - Brookfield, WI
WI Realtors - Luxury - Short Sale - CDPE, REDS

I know Jay....sometimes we don't talk the same language...we still care about each other and you know things that this blog doesn't say....what I guess I have learned is...if you are going to pretend to care...don't just be there when it's convenient for you....and when I call, e-mail, write, knock....be too busy....it doesn't work for me personally or professionally....the stress no one needs...the make believe friends are all gone.

December 01, 2009 08:24 PM #5
Rainmaker
454,615
Wendy Rulnick
Rulnick Realty, Inc. - Destin, FL
Destin FL Real Estate

Sally & David - I've seen that pop up. Like when people sap you for information, knowledge, etc.  but are *never* there for any sincere kindness.  It is shallowness.

December 01, 2009 08:48 PM #6
Rainmaker
1,360,165
Sally K. & David L. Hanson
Keller Williams 414-525-0563 - Brookfield, WI
WI Realtors - Luxury - Short Sale - CDPE, REDS

It's when it's alllllll about them...they pretend to make it about you...and say all the things that are "politically correct: but don't expect a call, answer, e-mail...no one is there...not for anyone but themselves.

December 01, 2009 08:56 PM #7
Rainmaker
1,352,156
Kristin Johnston, Waukesha Realtor 414-254-6647
RE/MAX Realty Center - Waukesha, WI
Waukesha County Realtor, RE/MAX Buyer Agent

Great post and very wise!  I can totally relate to this one too!  I label these folks TOXIC as well!

December 02, 2009 08:01 AM #8
Rainmaker
1,360,165
Sally K. & David L. Hanson
Keller Williams 414-525-0563 - Brookfield, WI
WI Realtors - Luxury - Short Sale - CDPE, REDS

Toxic is a good word...the company you keep, the relationships you choose to foster...that is what is important....all the best !

December 02, 2009 08:05 AM #9
Rainmaker
543,273
Toula Rosebrock
Diane Turton, Realtors, Forked River, NJ - Lacey Township, NJ
Broker/Sales Associate, Realtor, Lacey Township,

ToulaRosebrock,com

Hi Sally:

I believe that we all know people like that...

Toxic is a good word for it!

December 02, 2009 08:20 AM #10
Ambassador
1,285,036
Silvia Dukes PA, REALTOR
Tropic Shores Realty - Ich spreche Deutsch! - Spring Hill, FL
Florida Waterfront and Country Club Living

Hi Sally, sometimes we allow people to take advantage of us like that.  We can't change them, we can only change ourselves and the way we behave toward them.  All the best!

December 03, 2009 07:52 PM #11
Rainmaker
1,360,165
Sally K. & David L. Hanson
Keller Williams 414-525-0563 - Brookfield, WI
WI Realtors - Luxury - Short Sale - CDPE, REDS

u got it...changing ourselves for the health of it all is the best we can do !

December 03, 2009 07:53 PM #12
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Rainmaker
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Sally K. & David L. Hanson

WI Realtors - Luxury - Short Sale - CDPE, REDS
For All Things Wisconsin Real Estate...Call the Hansons
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