I Would Never Be a Realtor!

Mortgage and Lending with Larry Bettag - Cherry Creek Mortgage

I can't, I won't....no way, no why, no way in hell!  My wife was one....for the sole purpose of being able to buy and sell properties that she owned before we were married.  I work with them all the time.  I've come to the conclusion that I'd rather eat a plate full of worms that do real estate for a living.

WHY, YOU ASK? I'd rather eat a plate full of worms 



you guys have patience.  I know that I have patience, heck, I have a great marriage and 5 kids.  But I don't have realtor patience.  In lending, I know that people are going to be with me or kick me to the curb, usually, in no more than an hour. 

You guys will spend an entire weekend or even an entire week showing a client the entire neighborhood, and, at the end of the week they say, "naaaaa, I think we'll look at a town about 35 miles away."  Are you frigging kidding me?  Where do I keep my Colt .45?  For me, you're in or you're out. None of this Mickey Mousing around! 

And just because I took one spouse while the other is out of town, doesn't mean the other spouse can come in and veto a week's worth of work!


After you get a deal together, you're income is dependent on some schmucky mortgage dude or dudette.  Oh wait, that's me! 

My point is that when I take an application, it's all on me and the underwriter.  I know a lot of you folks have great relationsips with awesome mortgage originators.  A lot of you don't.  I hate leaving my income in someone else's hands.  I can't help it.  I'm anal!  (no graphics here).  My type A personality wants to know now.

 Image provided by http://www.dreamstime.com/free-stock-image-worms-4-rimagefree1403606-resi2857788 


You have to work weekends.  I work weekends as well, but I'm not giving my entire weekends hoping that Joe and Mary go to contract.  My realtor partners - yes, all of them - call me on the weekend.  I respond, give them what they need and move on to more work planning or doing my family stuff.


I took a personality profile test for my profession.  One of my findings said, and I'm paraphrasing here, "don't B.S. with Larry unless he wants to."  That's me to a T.  I think that I'm always nice, but I can't fake it forever.  If I'm in the car with Mr. and Mrs. Meathead for a weekend, I think you'd read about me going postal.  I want to serve people, I don't want to socialize with them all weekend....Heck, I love my wife, but neither of us wants to spend 1 full day in the car with each other.

You Realtors are a special breed!  You have DNA and talents that I don't have. 

I could never do your job!

Image provided by http://www.dreamstime.com/free-stock-image-worms-4-rimagefree1403606-

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Comments 215 New Comment

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Kathie Burby
REALTOR, SFR, Tuolumne County Real Estate Guide
Real Living Sugar Pine Realty

Thanks for recognizing that it is not all fun & games. That being said I LOVE BEING A REALTOR!

March 06, 2011 12:49 PM
DeeDee Riley
Realtor - El Dorado Hills & the Surrounding Areas
Lyon Real Estate - El Dorado Hills CA

Great post, Larry!  Likewise for me - I could not do what you lenders do.  To some degree you are dependent on us getting our people into contract.  And you have to keep all those constantly changing programs and criteria in your head.  My hat is off to you!!!

March 06, 2011 03:18 PM
Perky&Jody Magee
Harborside Realty


We really enjoyed our humor.  Client bashng is such a great release; a survival tactic Realtors have fed on since the beginning, no doubt.

You should try your hand at humor writing.  That may get you out of the mortgage industry, which we do believe ranks right next to ours.

Very best, Perky & Jody

March 06, 2011 06:15 PM
Victor Amadi
Greenville SC Realtor - Greenville SC Homes for Sale
PRODUCER Realty LLC - Greenville SC Real Estate

Well you know Larry, to each a zone. Don't forget that sometimes after we put in all that work, the deal can still fall apart.

March 06, 2011 06:46 PM
Eugene Adan
Carlsbad Real Estate
Adan Properties, Carlsbad, CA (760) 720-9710


I'm more like you! I might be a mortgage guy in a Realtor clothes.

March 06, 2011 07:23 PM
Hans Bruhner
Sonoma County Home Loans
First Priority Financial

Larry, that was great. We need to have some fun out there and we need to work together. I did not get to read all of the posts but Morris Massre and Randy Ostrander added a lot to the fun as well. If you get a chance, take a look at the video I made and posted here to AR at http://activerain.com/blogsview/2173526/for-serious-realtors-only-

March 06, 2011 07:44 PM
Kent Dills
Real Estate 817-495-8028, Bellingham, Washington
Broker, Dills Real Estate

Larry.  Very funny post.  You definitely have insight into what a Realtor's life is like.  It's ironic how sometimes the truth hurts, and sometimes the truth is funny.  Different sides of the coin I guess.  Great perspective!

March 06, 2011 08:36 PM
Gina Lemos
Orange County CA Real Estate Agent
North Orange County CA Real Estate Specialists

Hey Larry,

Funny post! I've worked both sides of the fence- I've been a loan originator for about 15 years, but I've also worked as a real estate agent, so I know what you're talking about with the whole "weekend" issue. I have many friends and acquaintances that are real estate agents, and I can't tell you how many times they missed basketball or baseball games, while I was there, able to enjoy watching my son play. Even if I had a calculator and notepad out, and was on the phone part of the time, at least I was able to attend and be a part of what was important to him.

It's truly a sacrifice of family time and moments that you'll never get back. I applaud every real estate agent that is committed to doing a good job for their clients, and hope they can find balance in their lives!

Have a great week!

Gina Lemos

March 06, 2011 09:13 PM
Joy Carter & Jeff Booker Brother and Sister Team
Trust Your Family's Move To Our Expertise!
Keller Williams Partners Realty-GreatFloridaHomes Team

Larry - I do love my job, but I would hate it without the breaks because I have your no BS personality. 

My partner is my brother so we work 11 day shifts sand then get 2 days off.  Mom lives with me, so if we vacation as a family, it is a working vacation for both of us...otherwise there is TWO DAYS of blissful peace, twice a month.  I even change all of my voice-mails to say If you are calling about real estate, DO NOT LEAVE A message, but please call my partner, he'll be delighted to assist you.  All voice-mails go back at midnight the night before I work again to tell everyone I'm refreshed and ready (for another 11 days!  ;-)  Joy

March 06, 2011 09:22 PM
Experience The Difference
Orange County, CA : Laguna Niguel, Dana Point, San Clemente

Larry, this is so funny.  Thank you for summarizing my job in a manner that I had never realized.  However, my husband has the same opinion that you do and will love your blog.  Thank you for making me see how hard I really work.  I didn't realize it.

March 06, 2011 10:30 PM
William James Walton Sr.
Greater Waterbury Real Estate


This is funny....and I agree, I wouldn't trade places with you either. I like doing what I do, and I would assume that you like what you do too...

March 06, 2011 10:50 PM
Liane Thomas - Corona & Riverside Real Estate
Bringing you Home!
The Jet Team, Keller Williams Realty, Corona Real Estate

Cute picture of the girl and the worms! Nope, I wouldn't be a loan officer, either. Seems like the rules for you are changing every day.

March 07, 2011 10:02 AM
Sylvie Stuart
Home Buying, Home Selling and Investment - Flagstaff, AZ
Keller Williams Check Realty 928-600-2765

Too funny! Thanks for the laugh!! Yeah, this business isn't cut out for everyone!=)

March 07, 2011 11:30 AM
Don Bass
V.I.P. Real Estate

Thats why I prefer to work with sellers. No weekends, predetermined day to talk each week to clients. You can work with more sellers at the same time than you can with buyers. spend time on your business instead of in it. Many reasons but mostly because It works and it is more profitable.

March 07, 2011 12:30 PM
Dennis & Terri Neal
RE/MAX, Big Bear

Great post. Sellers are easier to work with and ultimately more rewarding.

March 07, 2011 02:46 PM
RhondaHeaslip NanaimoRealEstate
RE/MAX of Nanaimo

I had a good laugh with this post. I'm sure I've met some of those clients! Conversely, I'm glad I'm not a loan officer and thank god for the good ones out there :)

March 07, 2011 11:12 PM
Dawn A Fabiszak
The Dawn of a New Real Estate Experience!
Keller Williams Real Estate ( Denver metro area, Colorado

Larry ~ I love the real estate business.  At an early age (around 10) I knew I wanted to be a REALTOR(R).   The public thinks we get paid way too much for doing nothing.  Thanks for seeing what it can really be.  On the other hand, I wouldn't want to have your job!

March 08, 2011 05:26 AM
Matthew Belmont
Residential Loan Officer
Amerifirst Financial, Inc.

Too funny Larry.  You are spot on and I couldnt agree more. 

March 09, 2011 12:45 AM
Jon Quist
Tucson's BUYERS ONLY Realtor since 1996

Sounds great to me. Where do I sign up? I get bored on the weekends. And I love people who can't make up their mind on anything!

March 10, 2011 12:38 AM
Sandy McAlpine
Search Lake Norman Homes For Sale - Lake Norman NC
McAlpine Properties

funny perspective! I have had some of that feeling before!

April 10, 2011 10:22 PM
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Larry Bettag

Regional Vice-President
What to know how to buy if you're a bit credit challenged?
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