"Send beds to listing agent" - Are YOU Asleep at the Keyboard?

By
Real Estate Agent with Sotheby's International Realty BRE # 01362887

Guy bouncing on a Bed

We may have just taken a holiday, but there certainly was no holiday from real estate bloopers on the MLS, as well as on the web and in local ads. Georgina Hunter  from beautiful Maui found a lovely blooper this week involving valves,  AR's Bruce Walter sent some great gaffes from Indiana, and Fred Glick from Philadelphia is back with Fred's Follies: Stupid Real Estate Questions From the Web. Wende Schoof from San Francisco and Jane Peters from Los Angeles also found some doozies. Please enjoy:

Pardon me?

"Send beds to listing agent"  (Why bother - you're already asleep on the job.)

"Tediously maintained grounds" (Offered by Hoe-n-Hernia Realty)

"Brand New - Crowning soon" (I suggest you call your obstetrician.)

"Blank approval required" (Then look in the mirror, pal.)

"Additional guess house" (The only guess is how you got your license.)

"Sinkin living room" (Sunken career.)

"Nice Interior shed" (Lovely - an in-house outhouse designed by  Jethro Clampett , your local indoor plumbing specialist.)

You've Got To be Kidding

"We can fiance you" (Good luck with that - I can't even get a date.)

"New lower pride" (I hear ya, pal. In this economy, I'd sell a skating rink to a legless corpse if I could get a signature.)

"New Pool for Sumner" (If you're referring to Sumner Redstone, he needs a new pool like I need crotch itch.)

"Nice house in Inland Umpire"  (Hey, Abbott and Costello - "Who's on first?")

"Approved building plans... a $10,000 valve" (Either this is a house in the middle of  Hoover Dam, or Dr Michael DeBakey is back from the dead.)

Fred's Follies (Question from Trulia)

Question:"i am realtor i was wandering how can get listings becuse had work before"

Answer: Dear Idiot, I suspect it is your mind that is wandering. I suggest you remove the icepick from your cranium before you honk and proceed.  You mentioned that you "had work before." I am sorry to inform you that weaving baskets on Ward 6 doesn't qualify you for anything other than politics. In Washington, confusion is an art form, and you are a natural. Good luck - you have my vote.

 

FOR MORE REAL ESTATE HUMOR, VISIT WWW.SHERLOCKOFHOMES.BLOGSPOT.COM/ OR YOU CAN ALSO VISIT GWEN BANTA AT WWW.LAHOMESITE.COM. THANKS FOR READING!

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673,802
Karen Crowson
Alain Pinel Realtors, Pleasanton, CA - Livermore, CA
Livermore Wine Country Homes

These are hysterical. Makes you wonder if someone is using their 'smart' phone to write this stuff.

Jul 10, 2011 11:01 AM #37
Rainmaker
339,900
Navona Hart
Real Living Cornerstone - Farmville, VA
Real Estate Agent, Farmville Virginia Homes & Land

I love this Gwen, came here because of Patricia--love her round up posts.  Made me laugh and the photo of the guy jumping on the bed is priceless.....

Jul 10, 2011 12:42 PM #38
Rainmaker
209,439
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Jay, the Hollywood Bowl is a Chinese dish you can only order if you are wearing sunglasses and have an agent ;) Actually, it's an outdoor concert stage and a pavilion shaped like a bowl. The seats vary from boxes to bleachers. Thus, on warm California nights, we watch magical performances under the stars, surrounded by the sent of eucalyptus and night-blooming jasmine. They offer every time of music and dance performance you can imagine. Oh - and you can bring a picnic and booze!

Jul 10, 2011 12:56 PM #39
Rainmaker
209,439
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Thank you, Patricia - and I LOVE your blog! (Check it out, folks.)

Jul 10, 2011 12:57 PM #40
Rainmaker
209,439
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Karen, I am constantly amazed at how smart phones substitute the wrong words. I think auto-fill is tantamount to landfill!

Jul 10, 2011 12:58 PM #41
Rainmaker
570,046
Bill Gillhespy
16 Sunview Blvd - Fort Myers Beach, FL
Fort Myers Beach Realtor, Fort Myers Beach Agent - Homes & Condos

Hi Gwen,  Funny stuff.  Is there a book in your future ???

Jul 10, 2011 01:02 PM #42
Rainmaker
209,439
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Thank you so much, Navona. And incidentally, I once caught a man jumping on a bed at an open house. Not a kid - a grown man! I was so flabbergasted, all I could say was, "Is this your way of sending a message to the owner because he's ba__ing your wife?" He looked at me as though I were the nut case!

Jul 10, 2011 01:06 PM #43
Rainmaker
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Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Bill, that depends...does getting booked count?

Jul 10, 2011 01:16 PM #44
Rainmaker
658,546
Evelyn Kennedy
Gallagher & Lindsey, Alameda, California - Alameda, CA
Alameda, Real Estate, Alameda, CA

Gwen:

Your bloopers are priceless.  How can agents publish information that is go garbled with so many misspelled words and grammatical errors?  What were they thinking?

Jul 10, 2011 01:36 PM #45
Rainmaker
209,439
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Evelyn, it may be erroneous to assume they can think! :)

Jul 10, 2011 01:48 PM #46
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Richard Weisser
Better Homes and Gardens Real Estate Metro Brokers - Newnan, GA
Richard Weisser Coweta Newnan Homes for Sale

Gwen...

This is great. Pat Kennedy sent me over to this post and I'm glad she did. I'm subscribing so I don't miss another one!

Jul 10, 2011 02:22 PM #47
Rainmaker
209,439
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Thank you, Richard, and thank YOU, Patricia. The blooper blog comes out almost every Friday...unless I'm hungover :)

Jul 10, 2011 02:28 PM #48
Rainmaker
391,615
Kristine Ginsberg
Morris County, NJ: Elite Staging and Redesign, LLC - Morris Plains, NJ
Morris County, NJ Stager

Gwen - not only are the typos hilarious and sad at the same time, but the best - your witting and oh, so funny commentary - I just love your sense of humor! I'll have to check out your blooper blogs on Fridays - these are priceless!

Jul 10, 2011 07:59 PM #49
Rainmaker
209,439
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Thanks, Kristine. Welcome aboard the Blooper Scooper!

Jul 10, 2011 09:06 PM #50
Rainmaker
268,155
Tamara Inzunza
RE/MAX Executives / www.MovingToNova.com / 703-623-8759 - Alexandria, VA
Homes for Sale In Alexandria VA & South County

I love the bloopers!  I'll have to start keeping a list because every now and then I come across some that truly make me raise an eyebrow.

Jul 10, 2011 11:17 PM #51
Rainmaker
209,439
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Yes, yes, yes, Tamara - send them to me!

Jul 10, 2011 11:23 PM #52
Rainmaker
906,020
Jane Peters
Power Brokers Int'l - Los Angeles, CA
Connecting you to the L.A. real estate scene

Juli came up with a good one for crowning.  I have no idea what that would mean either.  Another end of week giggle.

Jul 11, 2011 12:10 AM #53
Rainmaker
209,439
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Jane, myabe the crowning room is the bathroom - place of the "throne."

Jul 11, 2011 01:07 AM #54
Rainer
10,126
Cecilia G. Ramos
REMAX Infinity - Las Cruces, NM
Short Sale & REO Specialist,e-PRO

Lol!  Those are some good ones!  Thanks for the laugh. 

Jul 12, 2011 05:17 PM #55
Rainmaker
209,439
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Look for more on Friday, Cecilia!

Jul 12, 2011 05:40 PM #56
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