Merry Christmas to all My Female Friends!!!

By
Real Estate Agent with Keller Williams Realty Boise Idaho SP20114
http://actvra.in/pX4

Borrowing this from my good Friend Gail Leath...

 

 

Merry Christmas To My Female Friends

 

        If I were ol' Santa, you know what I'd do

        I'd dump silly gifts that are given to you

        And deliver some things just inside your front door

        Things you have lost, but treasured before.

 

        I'd give you back all your maidenly vigor,

        And to go along with it, a neat tiny figure.

        Then restore the old color that once graced your hair

        Before rinses and bleaches took residence there.

 

        I'd bring back the shape with which you were gifted

        So things now suspended need not be uplifted.

        I'd draw in your tummy and smooth down your back

        Till you'd be a dream in those tight fitting slacks.

 

        I'd remove all your wrinkles and leave only one chin

        So you wouldn't spend hours rubbing grease on your skin.

        You'd never have flashes or queer dizzy spells,

        And you wouldn't hear noises like ringing of bells.

 

        No sore aching feet and no corns on your toes,

        No searching for spectacles when they're right on your nose.

        Not a shot would you take in your arm, hip or fanny,

        From a doctor who thinks you're a nervous old granny.

 

        You'd never have a headache, so no pills would you take.

        And no heating pad needed since your muscles won't ache.

        Yes, if I were Santa, you'd never look stupid,

        You'd be a cute little chick with the romance of a cupid.

 

        I'd give a lift to your heart when those wolves start to whistle,

        And the joys of your heart would be light as a thistle.

        But alas! I'm not Santa. I'm simply just me,

        The matronest of matrons you ever did see.

 

        I wish I could tell you all the symptoms I've got,

        But I'm due at my doctor's for an estrogen shot.

        Even though we've grown older, this wish is sincere,

        Merry Christmas to you and a Happy New Year.

                                 

 

 

Posted by

Bzybee Logo

Deborah Byron Leffler   SFR, PMN "The BZYBEE REALTOR"

Keller Williams Realty Boise

Serving All of Boise, Nampa, Meridian, Eagle, Caldwell, Marsing, Wilder, Homedale and Middleton

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Topic:
ActiveRain Community
Groups:
40 Somethings
Be The Best In Your Field
Club Chaos
National Women's Council of Realtors - Not Just for Women!
Rainer's Women's Council of Realtors
Tags:
thought of the day
humour for women
jokes for women
christmas laughs

Comments 9 New Comment

Anonymous
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Rainmaker
616,842
Deborah Byron Leffler BzyBee Real Estate Lady!
Keller Williams Realty Boise

LOL  Belinda....I think a lot of us can relate to these!   LOL  

Kathleen....I could go for a spa treatment too!!   What a wonderful gift that would be!

December 20, 2011 01:46 PM
Rainmaker
460,182
Judith Parker
CRS, GRI, CMRS, Charlotte, NC
ProStead Realty

Hi Deborah, Merry Christmas to you.  This is such a great poem and it made me smile.  Oh the things we go thru as women.  Have a great evening!

December 20, 2011 08:41 PM
Rainmaker
616,842
Deborah Byron Leffler BzyBee Real Estate Lady!
Keller Williams Realty Boise

Judith....isn't that the truth!!!  LOL   Merry Christmas to you!!

December 21, 2011 05:33 PM
Rainmaker
278,182
Marie Graham
Westchester County Interior Decorator, Home Stager
Owner, The Refreshed Home White Plains NY

Hi Deborah-just caught this, FUNNY and sweet, thanks!

December 27, 2011 08:53 PM
Rainmaker
616,842
Deborah Byron Leffler BzyBee Real Estate Lady!
Keller Williams Realty Boise

Marie...so glad you liked it!!!   Happy New Year!

December 27, 2011 09:13 PM
Anonymous
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Rainmaker
616,842

Deborah Byron Leffler BzyBee Real Estate Lady!

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