How To Be The World's Most Annoying Real Estate Agent

By
Real Estate Agent with Evers & Company Real Estate, Inc. AB95346

Now, many of you will recognize a colleague or two in this post.  But will you recognize yourself?  I actually inspired a couple of these, though I won't say which ones!  So, here goes:

Drive a really expensive car with only two seats, and make your clients drive their Honda when you go out house hunting.   Not me.  But someone I know. It's a fabulous vehicle.  He should get a second car that will hold at least two passengers.

Drive like a lunatic so they would rather drive their car or do just about anything else rather than get into any car when their agent is behind the wheel.  There was a top producing agent in the DC area who was notorious.  She never had an accident, but I had a near death experience the one time I sat in the suicide seat in her Mercedes.

Misplace their earnest money check.  I almost did this today, and I spend an hour in complete panic mode - it was a huge check and good grief!  If I was careless enough to lose a huge check, what else will they expect me to screw up.  I found it, and my newly organized desk did make things easier.

Have a Car Office that looks like my home office did before I morphed into a neat desk freak.  I've seen agents' cars strewn with papers (including clients' financial information sheets), food that was turning into a cure for the next plague, even (God forbid) cigarette butts.  Don't smoke in your real estate car, folks!

Smell like smoke or strong perfume.  Smokers, even fastidious smokers, can get pretty stinky.  But too much of a good smell can be just as bad.  I've had a few clients who had allergies to perfume so I never wear it while working.

Clear out your messy car, stuff everything into your trunk so the car looks spotless, and then have a flat tire.  Of course, all of the junk has to come out of the trunk so you can get to the spare tire.  That happened to me once, and it was pretty humiliating. 

Show up late for appointments.  This is even more annoying if the agent gets huffy when clients are even a couple of minutes late.

Try to regale clients with funny real estate stories.  Don't do this.  Instead, let them talk!  Listen to what they say!  Feed it back to them to be sure you're hearing it right, and then it will make your job a lot easier! If you want to tell funny stories about your real estate practice, write a book!

Between the time you write the offer and the date of settlement, bad mouth the agent on the other side of the deal.  No, no!  This person is your new best friend, at least as far as your client is concerned.  I don't care if he or she is the village idiot and a sleezer to boot!  If that's the case, your job is to shield your clients from them.

Tell lies.  First, you'll probably get caught.  But even if you don't, keeping your stories straight will increase your stress level.  This even applies to little white lies.  Getting caught in a white lie will destroy your credibility with clients and colleagues.  

This is not intended to be a complete list.  You're welcome to suggest any additions! 

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Topic:
Real Estate Sales and Marketing
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Ambassador
438,297
Deb "Alayne" Brooks
940-500-4010 Wichita Falls Real Estate
Alayne Brooks, Re/Max Elite Group, Wichita Falls Texas
Patricia, You're a hoot! Thanks for the giggles. I won't admit that I saw myself in one or two of those places. Not always but...hum. I could probably add a couple but I won't. So there. Deb
November 23, 2007 09:38 PM
Rainer
24,435
Bill Westel
ECO
Eco-Steward Realty

Patricia:

I drive a Toyota Highlander with no trunk. Need 4wd in the mountains. So this forces me to keep it clean with no trunk as a back up.

November 24, 2007 10:48 PM
Rainer
66,710
Darleen McCullen
Broker - Raleigh, NC Real Estate
Patricia ~ So many of us have a lot of work to do. This is a great list. I think my biggest pet peeve is the "smelly agent". I wrote a blog about this recently. Urgh! Sometimes, I think the people don't know how terrible they smell to others.
November 25, 2007 11:17 AM
Ambassador
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Karen Kruschka
- "My Experience Isn't Expensive - It's PRICELESS"
RE/MAX Real Estate Connections
Patricia,  The one that blows my mind are agents who have political bumper stickers on their car - that has the potential of alienating a substantial number of clients, Karen
November 25, 2007 05:31 PM
Rainer
10,498
Pat Emmett
Prudential Palms Realty
How about agents who take phone calls from other customers while driving and while showing homes?  Isn't the customer in your presence the most important person of the moment?  Pat
November 25, 2007 07:32 PM
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Patricia Kennedy

For Your Home in the Capital
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Additional Information

Pat Kennedy -- author of The Irreverent Guide to Real Estate -- gives you a look at life on the streets as a real estate broker in our nation's capital. And her blog is peppered with great advice combined with humor!