Federal Funding Made Available for the Study of "Stupid" (disclaimer: this is not serious)

By
Managing Real Estate Broker with Winchester Real Estate Sales, Cornerstone Business Group Inc 0225086119
http://actvra.in/tjs

After a great deal of debate, and few closed door sessions, the Obama Man losing his marblesadministration has agreed to make Federal funds available for the long overdue study of "Stupid."  With millions of Americans suffering from this insidious disease, it was only a matter of time before it made it to the top of the list of diseases plaguing our society.  Previous funding has been insufficient to arrest and cure this malady.

DebateBoth sides of the isle complained that $3.9 million dollar study would cripple some of the programs already underway throughout the country.  The good senator from Florida complained that removing the turtle crossing signs was going to lead to the deaths of thousands of unsuspecting turtles crossing highway 27.  He stated that it was obvious that the Republicans don't like turtles and they don't care if they get smashed on the highway.

Running TurtleAfter much research, it was discovered that the signs placed along highway 27 were actually incorrect anyway.  The sign verbiage was written in a South American turtle dialect unknown to the Florida area turtles.  The mistake had accidentally led to numerous disoriented turtles who took the highway access instead of the tunnel provided below the highway.  EMTs have been overwhelmed with the constant calls from passing motorists who were witnessing the unintended carnage.  Removing the signs will help their terribly under-staffed departments.

The other project that is being scrapped is the Shrimp on the Treadmill study.  Though it's important to know how fast and how far a shrimp can run on a Shrimptreadmill, the study inadvertently had a very negative side effect.  Area fishermen had discovered that the shrimp were getting harder to catch due to their increased aerobic capacity and their increase in muscle density. 

PETA weighed in on the debate stating that it is only reasonable that shrimp be given every advantage to out run the fisherman's nets since the nets are so big and the shrimp are so small.  They promised to hold protests in front of Captain D's, Arthur Treachers and Red Lobster in all of the districts represented by the congressmen voting for the current withdraw of funding.  

Though the debate has been fierce, the need is so great that the country can no longer ignore the spread of Stupid.  Without the Federal funding, millions of Americans would continue suffering from this silent afflict-or.  Stupid is one of those rare diseases that attacks people of all walks of life.  It sees no difference between rich and poor, tall or short, fat or skinny, educated or uneducated or male or female. 

Nancy Pelosi complained that the only reason this has come up now is because a handful of rich men on the right have shown signs of Stupid.  The truth is, Stupid is a non-partisan illness.  Both sides of the isle and all segments of society have seen increases in instances of this disease.  

Crazy man running

I applaud President Obama for his bold and compassionate stance on funding this program.    

close

This entry hasn't been re-blogged:

Re-Blogged By Re-Blogged At
Topic:
ActiveRain Community
Location:
Virginia
Groups:
"Whacked"!!!
WeBlog Anything (almost)!
The Lounge at Active Rain
BananaTude
Active Rain Newbies
Tags:
federal funding made available for the study of stupid

Post a Comment
Spam prevention
Spam prevention
Show All Comments
Rainmaker
1,179,618
Scott Godzyk
Godzyk Real Estate Services - Manchester, NH
One of Manchester NH's Leading Agents

Mike th ebottom line is most politicians lose their mind when they hit the brokers of DC and forget why they are there, They forget they are supposed to represent the people from where they were voted into office. Soon their party and special interests take over them and they become part of the problem instead of the solution. Have a great Saturday

Feb 18, 2012 08:57 AM #1
Rainmaker
839,329
Mike Cooper
Winchester Real Estate Sales, Cornerstone Business Group Inc - Winchester, VA
Your Winchester, VA Real Estate Pro

So true, Scott.  My wife always says there is something in the Potomac that makes people stupid when they cross that river. 

Feb 18, 2012 08:59 AM #2
Rainmaker
857,695
David Spencer
Keller Williams Team Realty - Bloomingdale, IL
Chicago Area Commercial-Residential R.E.

We all must strive to better our society. No one wants "Stupid".

Feb 18, 2012 09:08 AM #3
Rainer
146,012
Michael S. Bolton
Michael S. Bolton,Inc. - Zimmerman, MN
MN Appraiser

Once they arrive all they can think about is getting re-elected, at whatever cost. I've always liked the idea of term limits, as matter of fact I think most people do, that is until you get to Washington. There is going to be a lot of silliness over the next several months. Buckle-up, it would be entertaining if our situation wasn't so dire.

Have an AWESOME weekend!

 

Feb 18, 2012 09:13 AM #4
Rainmaker
839,329
Mike Cooper
Winchester Real Estate Sales, Cornerstone Business Group Inc - Winchester, VA
Your Winchester, VA Real Estate Pro

Absolutely, David.

Michael, I have a feeling you're right.  Yeow!

Feb 18, 2012 09:22 AM #5
Ambassador
1,270,952
Dick Greenberg
New Paradigm Partners LLC - Fort Collins, CO
Northern Colorado Residential Real Estate

Well, Mike, if they really want to get a handle on "stupid", at least the travel budget will be very low.

Feb 18, 2012 01:16 PM #6
Rainmaker
839,329
Mike Cooper
Winchester Real Estate Sales, Cornerstone Business Group Inc - Winchester, VA
Your Winchester, VA Real Estate Pro

They would have a lot of subjects to study, right, Dick?  

Feb 18, 2012 01:22 PM #7
Rainmaker
498,811
Jan Green
Scottsdale, Phoenix, Cave Creek, Carefree, Fountain Hills - Scottsdale, AZ
RE/MAX Excalibur Scottsdale REALTOR®, GREEN

Mike - I had no idea where you were going with this, but by the time I got to the "turtle" part of the story it became evident!  Then I double checked to see where you are in the country.  You are smack in the middle of it and probably read much more of it in your local papers than others. Of course, we've got a lot of finger wagging going on down here!    And yes, stupid doesn't care what color, race, gender, religion, or anything else pertinent before it strikes.  Have a great weekend!

Feb 18, 2012 02:13 PM #8
Rainmaker
839,329
Mike Cooper
Winchester Real Estate Sales, Cornerstone Business Group Inc - Winchester, VA
Your Winchester, VA Real Estate Pro

Actually, Jan, it was bad drivers in my community that got me off on my little tongue and cheek dribble.  8-)  Have a great weekend.  We're expecting snow!

Feb 18, 2012 02:55 PM #9
Ambassador
751,788
Lori Bowers
La Quinta, CA
The Lori Bowers Group

Great sense of humor

Feb 18, 2012 03:02 PM #10
Rainmaker
839,329
Mike Cooper
Winchester Real Estate Sales, Cornerstone Business Group Inc - Winchester, VA
Your Winchester, VA Real Estate Pro

Thanks, Lori.  See what bad drivers do to me!

Feb 18, 2012 03:05 PM #11
Rainmaker
439,487
Jim Patton
Century 21 M&M - 209-633-2839 - Turlock, CA
Realtor - Stanislaus & Merced county Realtor.

Mike the $3.9 million allotted to this study will not be enough.  Great post.

Feb 18, 2012 03:17 PM #12
Rainmaker
839,329
Mike Cooper
Winchester Real Estate Sales, Cornerstone Business Group Inc - Winchester, VA
Your Winchester, VA Real Estate Pro

Do you think we should double it, Jim?  

Feb 18, 2012 03:18 PM #13
Rainmaker
1,776,476
Dorie Dillard
Coldwell Banker United Realtors - Austin, TX
Realtor-Canyon Creek- NW, Austin TX Homes For Sale

Hi Mike,

Oh yeah..it's going to get real entertaining..unfortunately at the tax payers expense!

Feb 18, 2012 03:54 PM #14
Rainmaker
342,191
Vern Eaton
Askov, MN
Realtor 320-630-6995

It is real simple...Stupid people should not be aloowed to breed.

Feb 18, 2012 04:03 PM #15
Ambassador
1,504,057
Anna Banana Kruchten
Phoenix Property Shoppe - Phoenix, AZ
Arizona's Top Banana of Real Estate!

Mike I had a great time reading this!  It made me laugh for sure.  Stupid is as stupid does.  Oh I could go on and one but I'm in the middle of market reports and no time for stupid now!!  I so look forward to these coming months and politics!!

Feb 18, 2012 04:07 PM #16
Rainmaker
839,329
Mike Cooper
Winchester Real Estate Sales, Cornerstone Business Group Inc - Winchester, VA
Your Winchester, VA Real Estate Pro

As always, Dorie.  8-(

Vern, I've heard that before.  I think there is a growing sentiment there.

I have a feeling this is going to be a wild one, Anna.  

Feb 18, 2012 04:14 PM #17
Rainmaker
820,613
David Shamansky
US Mortgages - David Shamansky - Highlands Ranch, CO
Creative, Aggressive & 560 FICO - OK, Colorado Mtg

Stupid is as stupid does and thsi administration leads the class!

Feb 18, 2012 07:54 PM #18
Rainmaker
839,329
Mike Cooper
Winchester Real Estate Sales, Cornerstone Business Group Inc - Winchester, VA
Your Winchester, VA Real Estate Pro

As Forrest would say.  Happy Sunday, David!

Feb 18, 2012 08:10 PM #19
Post a Comment
Spam prevention
Show All Comments
Rainmaker
839,329

Mike Cooper

Your Winchester, VA Real Estate Pro
Winchester has a place for you! Call me.
*
*
*
Spam prevention

Additional Information