I Happen To Love SPAM - What's Wrong With The World?

By
Home Inspector with Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC

I happen to love SPAM - what's wrong with the world?  Things are getting way, way out of whack. 

SPAM is a wonderful food.  The word itself is wonderful!  It's a contraction of two words - Spicy and Ham! 

Contract the two and get SPAM!

My first introduction to SPAM was when I was 11 years old and on my first Boy Scout camping trip.

Seeing it cooking on the campfire griddle it smelled a lot like ham.  But I didn't know what it was.

They explained to me, teasing of course, that it was made up of everything on the pig that nobody wanted to eat - the snout, the toenail, the knuckles, the tail, and everything else obnoxious and unappetizing.

But everyone else ate it, so I tasted it and IT WAS GOOD!

Just look at it sitting there, proudly, among all the other pretenders.  Vienna sausage?  Are you kidding?  Chunk light tuna?  What are you thinking?

SPAM is it baby.

And I have enjoyed it on camping trips ever since that first, delicious introduction.  Even now, as a Scoutmaster or other camp adult, I want to see SPAM on the menu!

And now what do we get?  The world is crazy!  I hear about SPAM blockers, SPAM blacklisters, SPAM filters, and SPAM preventers!  And that somehow SPAM is "socially unacceptable."  I read that SPAM is being sent to people who do not want it, like it's some form of fruit cake!  WHAT??  ARE YOU PEOPLE CRAZY?  Who wouldn't want SPAM??

And, the lie of all lies, SPAM is being connected to viruses, worms and it's said that it is found to be sent by people phishing.  Well, that just reaches the end of my rope!  SPAM is SPICY HAM!  There is no phish in it!

THIS MADNESS HAS TO STOP!!

And so, in the interest of fairness and to raise the SOCIAL CONSCIOUSNESS, I propose to start a lobbying group.

I am calling my group S.P.A.M.

Coming soon to a neighborhood near you will be a fine building. It will be in the shape of a SPAM can.

On top will be large neon letters -- S P A M!

There will be two entrances.  One will be for the more business minded.  Over the door will be a sign saying:

S.P.A.M!

SPAM PURVEYORS ARE MARVELOUS!

The other door will be for the more socially inclined.  Over this door will be another sign saying:

S.P.A.M!

SPAM PREVENTERS ARE MEAN!

Outside our buildings you will detect the wafting aroma of SPAM cooking on a griddle!  When you smell it you will know you are home.

Each door will open to the same greeting area.  Just walk in and say, "Hi.  I'm _____________ and I love SPAM!"

You will be greeted warmly.  A vast buffet will be served presenting SPAM in a colorful and glorious array of deliciousness.  Immediately you will be invited to enjoy and savor every culinary idea in the extraordinary buffet presentation!

Admission is free. 

Bring your appetite!



Posted by

Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC  

Based in Bristow, serving all of Northern Virginia.

Office (703) 330-6388   Cell (703) 585-7560

www.jaymarinspect.com


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Re-Blogged 1 time:

Re-Blogged By Re-Blogged At
  1. Bob Crane 08/15/2012 12:23 AM
Topic:
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Rainmaker
1,280,220
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

Kittens and I have a lot in common. 

Please send them over to play.

I promise them a great time!

They will make an excellent gift for that wonderful big guy who lives in my house.

Love,

Jenny

Aug 12, 2012 11:57 AM #24
Rainmaker
160,731
Satar Naghshineh
Satar - Amiri Property and Financial Services Corp. - Irvine, CA

I would stock up on SpAM so when the global currency crises hits, you can survive till you can either grow your own food or the farm to table distribution resumes.

Aug 12, 2012 12:00 PM #25
Ambassador
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Jason Sardi
Auto & Home & Life Insurance throughout North Carolina - Charlotte, NC
Your Agent for Life

Satar - If that happens, I vote we have a big AR Slumber Party at your abode.  Picture it, we will have one room with a cage where we can debate the finer points of Politics.  And who says the end of time as we know it can't be fun?

Aug 12, 2012 12:02 PM #26
Rainmaker
1,280,220
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

Once the dollar is no longer the world's reserve currency (with movements afloat to do just that) I be SPAM would be worth its weight in gold and we could all come for a big sleep over.  We'll be done, however, and there won't be any politics to debate.

Just a thought...

Aug 12, 2012 12:04 PM #27
Rainmaker
160,731
Satar Naghshineh
Satar - Amiri Property and Financial Services Corp. - Irvine, CA

@Jason - I'm married, my home is already a cage! Should we ever have a currency crises, you and Jennifer are always welcome at my place. Hopefully Jennifer doesn't mind you and I sharing a sleeping bag and a can of SPAM. ;)

@Jay - I'll take SPAM over gold any day. You can't eat gold. It will be interesting to see how the bond market will recover, or if it can even recover. Luckily they post poned QE3.

I also disagree, we will be talking politics. However, it will be talks of a revolution. Will you be at the FEMA camps?? I'll come and get you!

Aug 12, 2012 01:06 PM #28
Rainmaker
1,280,220
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

"Worth its weight in gold" is a different way of saying valuable, Satar.  And QE3 would have no effect, so the real question is why.

SPAM, however, will rule the day.

Aug 12, 2012 02:46 PM #29
Rainmaker
589,712
Than Maynard
Coldwell Banker Heart of Oklahoma - Purcell, OK
Broker - Licensed to List & Sell - 405-990-8862

Parents tried to feed me SPAM as a kid. Didn't work then and won't work now.

Aug 12, 2012 07:58 PM #30
Rainmaker
1,280,220
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

To each his own, Than, but you could still be a precinct manager.  Consider it!

Aug 13, 2012 04:16 AM #31
Rainmaker
390,712
Karl Hess
Keller Williams Ocean County - Toms River, NJ
on The Jersey Shore

Jay...lots of stuff on those shelves....preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse?

Aug 13, 2012 06:03 AM #32
Rainmaker
1,280,220
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

Karl - that's a shelf at the 7-11 at the beach.  I guess that's what the locals and/or tourists want!

Do zombies eat canned meat?

Aug 13, 2012 06:07 AM #33
Rainer
277,437
Steven Cook
No Longer Processing Mortgages. - Tacoma, WA
- Pierce, King, Kitsap, Thurston, Mason Counties

Jay -- you would get along great over in Hawaii -- as they like their SPAM so much they have the highest per capita consumption of SPAM in the nation.

Aug 13, 2012 01:20 PM #34
Rainmaker
1,280,220
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

Steven - happy to know it.  I don't understand all these people thinking SPAM is a problem in the world.

Aug 13, 2012 01:29 PM #35
Rainer
189,758
Virginia Cheezum
F. C. Tucker Company - Indianapolis, IN

Life's too short to eat Spam, sorry Jay! 

Aug 14, 2012 09:54 AM #36
Rainmaker
1,280,220
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

Precisely why it is so recommended and consumed Virginia!

Aug 14, 2012 10:05 AM #37
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Bob Crane
Woodland Management Service - Stevens Point, WI
Forestland Experts! 715-204-9663

Thanks Jay, I am on your side of the debate. We keep a few cans in the truck for those weeks when we are out in the woods living on canned goods and pbj sandwiches, when you are without meat for a few days spam becomes a great treat.

Aug 15, 2012 12:10 AM #38
Rainmaker
1,280,220
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

Bob - it probably fills you up with all the food groups!  How healthy is that!?

Aug 15, 2012 02:25 AM #39
Ambassador
1,609,884
Kathy Streib
Room Service Home Staging - Delray Beach, FL
Home Stager - Palm Beach County,FL -561-914-6224

Jay- such grief you're taking all in the name of Spam.  I have to admit that an aunt used to serve it to us on occasion with scrambled eggs.  I'm not sure what I thought of it, but suffice it to say I haven't had it since!  Hey.. some people eat dead snails or raw fish!

Aug 18, 2012 05:18 PM #40
Rainmaker
1,280,220
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

Kathy - isn't it funny how language changes?  Think of all the ways words have been changed even in our short lifetimes, and now their meanings are entirely different than the originals!  Now "application" suddenly means something entirely new and different and has even been shortened.

Aug 19, 2012 03:50 AM #41
Rainmaker
858,848
Marte Cliff
Marte Cliff Copywriting - Priest River, ID
your real estate writer

Hmmm... I used to like Spam - but the last time I tried it I thought they'd changed the recipe. I think that about a LOT of foods I used to like. 

Maybe I'm just getting old and picky...

Jul 28, 2013 02:30 PM #42
Rainmaker
1,280,220
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

I ate it a short while ago Marte, for old time's sake, and found it extremely salty.  I bet I was used to very salty as a youth because of my grandmother's cooking and didn't notice then.

Jul 28, 2013 04:23 PM #43
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Rainmaker
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Jay Markanich

Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia
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