Friday's Humor - What my Mother taught me...

By
Real Estate Agent with Keller Williams

My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE:
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside -- I just finished cleaning!"

My mother taught me RELIGION:
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL:
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

My mother taught me LOGIC:
"Because I said so, that's why!"

My mother taught me FORESIGHT:
"Be sure you wear clean underwear in case you're in an accident."

My mother taught me IRONY:
"Keep laughing and I'll give you something to cry about."

My mother taught me about OSMOSIS:
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"

My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM:
"Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck!"

My mother taught me about STAMINA:
"You'll sit there 'til all that spinach is finished."

My mother taught me about WEATHER:
"It looks as if a tornado swept through your room."

My mother taught me how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS:
"If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you, would you listen then?"

My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY:
"If I've told you once, I've told you a million times -- don't exaggerate!!!"

My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE:
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION:
"Stop acting like your father!"

My mother taught me about ENVY:
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!"

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Tags:
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Comments 9 New Comment

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Rainer
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Lori Isaacson
Credit Restoration Consultants

opps forgot to log in...

Lori

October 03, 2008 12:19 PM
Rainer
8,797
Jeff Rogers
retired

That's cool, thanks for sharing.

October 03, 2008 12:21 PM
Rainer
70,854
Susan McQuaide
Keller Williams

Glad you enjoyed it! Lori and everyone else are welcome to use it - share a laugh - we all need one.

October 03, 2008 12:26 PM
Rainmaker
327,751
Dinah Lee Griffey
Managing Broker Windermere Peninsula Properties
Windermere Peninsula Properties

Great post Susan!I like your mother. She sounds like  mine-Dinah

October 03, 2008 12:34 PM
Rainer
49,855
James G. Pycha
(R), REMAX Kauai Broker
James Pycha (R) - REMAX KAUAI

Hi Susan ,  ,  VERY entertaining.  Great Mother.... good stuff . . .   Thanks for your post. Very good information.

Thanks

Jim

October 03, 2008 12:41 PM
Anonymous
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Rainer
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Susan McQuaide

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