The Whole Point Of The Pain In Saying I Do!

Real Estate Agent with Keller Williams Realty 0575737

Many who tune into the title of this blog post will say, "I need to check this out. Surely this is some kind of good marriage therapy advice, especially in the early years, to get you over the rocky spots." As Johnny Carson in his Carnac the Magnificent garb might tell you, "Oh but you would be so wrong wonder friend and may the fleas of a thousand camels nest in your shorts."


OK, a little bait and switch action here today. Don't tell me you've never seen that from a car dealer advertising one thing in the paper and you get to the lot and the real model costs $10,000 more? Kind of reminds me of new construction model homes compared to the standard issue product for the buyer. Anyway, I digress.

The "I Do" here that I refer to is deciding to do things out of your comfort zone. There really is a

Whole Point of the Pain in saying I Do!

What do we often say I do to?

  • I do want to volunteer
  • I do want to take this class
  • I do want to do Meals on Wheels
  • I do want to teach students with Junior Achievement
  • I do want to become a Realtor, Inspector, Mortgage person, Virtual Assistant, or even stay in this business

All worthy ambitions. All goals. All the little, or not so little "I Do's" in life we choose. There are millions of examples. But the tradeoffs? Don't forget that side of the ledger. The time invested. The hassle to our lives. The money expended. Not to mention the traffic you go through to accomplish your goal. Those little fifth graders you want to teach occasionally, they start their classes at 7:30 a.m. 90 minutes away from your house. Hello, you are a night owl. OK, so we can easily define pain with anything we set out to do. If we risk, we KNOW we are in for pain. But here is the beauty of life.


The "point" of going through the pain is very simple. One, you discover more about yourself than you knew previously. This is the volunteer effect where the volunteer gets more out of something than who gets the help. And most importantly for YOU number two,

You get the good feelings you need in your life.

It makes all the pain worthwhile.

Why ladies am I thinking of your child birth experience here?

Always know, the pain of the "I Do's" you so courageously reach out and strive for in life are well worth it if you get to that good feeling in life. Keep doing more and more of your I Do's and I promise you the good feelings will follow.


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ActiveRain Community
Texas Denton County Flower Mound
Diary of a Realtor
Stage It Forward...
The Storytellers In The Rain
pain i dos good feelings volunteer

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Marilyn Katz
ABR, e-PRO -
Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices New England Properties

Gary - Years ago, I recall reading a guest editorial in the NY Times magazine about how the author learned that doing the things that he didn't want to do, yet knew he should do, left him feeling good that he had done them. 

Although these examples may not be exactly what he wrote, they were things like traveling to a relative's birthday party, dreading the trip, but feeling rewarded at how much his presence was appreciated.   Reluctantly attending a funeral, only going because he felt obligated, then feeling good about himself for having done the right thing. 

February 27, 2009 08:31 PM
Carl Winters

People that give receive much in return. You are so right, two simple words "I DO" or "I WILL".

Have a nice weekend.

February 27, 2009 08:47 PM
Sharon Lee
Sharon Lee's Virtual Assistance

Gary-Great post. I love this line. "One, you discover more about yourself than you knew previously". I know myself pretty well. As the year progresses I know even more.


February 27, 2009 09:36 PM
Teresa Harris
Denver . Lake Norman . Charlotte
Lake Real Estate, LLC

This is the volunteer effect where the volunteer gets more out of something than who gets the all the volunteering I have done I have learned things I never knew before and it's just the greatest feeling knowing that you are helping someone else and contributing to something bigger than self. GREAT POST GARY!!!! Now where is that star?!?!?!

February 27, 2009 09:49 PM
William Johnson
San Diego Real Estate Voice, GRI CRS e-Pro CDPE
RE/MAX Associates

Hi Gary, No Pain , No Gain,

Certain ways of excercising indicate that if you excercsie up to the point of beginning to feel some discomfort, you are just maintaining. If you go beyond that, the pain is the breaking down of the musceles and it takes that to build them beyond mauntenance. The same holds true as you have  indicated here in your post, that to build and not just maintain, there is pain associated with it.

I can usually tell at what stage I am in, in life,  by the level of discomfort I am trying to endure. And of late, I know real pain and for that reason I am very encouraged.

February 27, 2009 09:55 PM
Laura Cerrano
Authentic Feng Shui Expert
Feng Shui Manhattan Long Island

Gary, I miss volunteering as much as I had in the past and will definitely go back to my favorite places when it warms up a bit to see what I can do.  You've very right, you learn things about yourself you never knew....and the feeling of helping others is just priceless.

February 27, 2009 10:15 PM
William Feela
Realtor, Whispering Pines Realty 651-674-5999 No.
WHISPERING PINES REALTY wife and I volenteer about 10 hrs a week each.  It's not all that much, but I sure do feel good doing that much

February 27, 2009 10:29 PM
Laura Watts
Positive Properties, LLC

Gary-It is so easy to stay in your comfort zone. I find myself doing just that-staying in my comfort zone.  I volunteered so much at one time that I got burned out after several years. Now, I do go outside my zone, but I am alot more cautious about volunteering too much. If it is something I really want to do, I will do it, but if I have doubts, I usually let it slide right by me..  Good Blog...

February 27, 2009 11:27 PM
Shelley Kreutzer
Community One Realty

Thanks Gary again for another great post. My husband and I have been trying to figure out more things to do together and to contribute more to out community. I 'THANK YOU' again for your post. I donate blood 6 times a year and I feel real good about that but together I know we can do so much more.

February 27, 2009 11:38 PM
Jeff Belonger
The FHA Expert - FHA Loans - FHA mortgages - USDA loans - VA Loans
Social Media - Infinity Home Mortgage Company, Inc

Gary... I would agree with many of the comments... okay, back... not sure what happened. Not that I have volunteered in a while, you make an excellent point. That we could find pain in many examples, but at the same time, self worth, because of the accomplishment. Anything in life takes time out of your life and schedule, but giving back to your community can be so rewarding at the end of the day. It's just doing it that can be the hard part so many times.  good post and reminder.

Jeff Belonger

February 27, 2009 11:59 PM
Dona Reynolds
St. Joseph MO
Prudential Summers Realtors

Hi Gary!  Good reminder about volunteerism.  Recently, I did a reading class at one of our local schools for the retarded.  The kids were absolutely thrilled and the feeling was mutual.  I DO and I WILL, the benefits are greater than the pain.

February 28, 2009 12:35 AM
Cathy Lee
CL Design Services Home Staging

Everything I have ever done out of my comfort zone has been the greatest joy and an inmate, washing a homeless man's feet, feeding an AID's bed ridden local resident a meal.  YOUR POINTS ARE SO TRUE.  love this post Gary!    

February 28, 2009 01:47 AM
Toula Rosebrock
Broker/Sales Associate, Realtor, Lacey Township,
Diane Turton, Realtors, Forked River, NJ

ToulaRosebrock.comHi Gary:

A great post to encourage people to volunteer.

As you already know, my volunteering involves rescuing homeless pets.  Very rewarding!

February 28, 2009 05:55 AM
Sandy Shores Broker, Melbourne Real Estate
Brevard County FL Real Estate
M & M Realty of Brevard Inc.

Hi Gary, So true that we must push ourselves to do things that help us learn more about ourselves than we previously knew. These events in our lives help define our inner souls. Great post!

February 28, 2009 08:53 AM
Richard Weisser
Richard Weisser Coweta Newnan Homes for Sale
Better Homes and Gardens Real Estate Metro Brokers


I read Susan M's post about meals on wheels, and you're right! Once she got involved, "through the pain" so to speak, she actually started to enjoy the experience. Who knows what joy and pleasure is awaiting us if we just make the effort?

February 28, 2009 09:24 AM
JL Boney, III
Columbia, SC Real Estate
Russell and Jeffcoat

You have to say I do to something in this life or else you're not really living.

February 28, 2009 10:32 AM
Sandy Nelson
your Olympia area Realtor
Riley Jackson Real Estate Inc.

Stretching is always painful, but as a result we'll be more nimble, feel better and reach further.

February 28, 2009 10:36 AM
Dorie Dillard
Realtor-Canyon Creek- NW, Austin TX Homes For Sale
Coldwell Banker United Realtors


Great post and I use to love watching "Carnac the Magnificent"! Johny Carson had some funny but poignant stuff but you have it all over him! Thanks for the message!

February 28, 2009 10:05 PM
Betina Foreman
Realtor, C.N.E. Selling Homes in Lake Travis & Central Austin!
512-771-6318 Austin Home Girls Realty

Another great post! I love the magnificent Carnac! I miss Johnny Carson. He was amazing. Its hard to believe his replacement is getting ready to retire too....

March 01, 2009 09:17 AM
Donna J. Stephens
BHHS Ambassador Real Estate

Maybe you haven't seen this,

Dom DeLuise does an egg trick on the Johnny Carson show!


This is so funny! I miss Johnny Carson!

March 05, 2009 08:58 AM
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Gary Woltal

Assoc. Broker Realtor SFR Dallas Ft. Worth
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